Adding Insult to Injury!!!
A Perfect Example of Adding Insult to Injury!
Welcome, Fellow Intellectuals, in the U.S.A. and around the World!
Q U I C K O B S E R V A T I O N #9:
Abhorrent Aftermath
of
Adoption
[ Not all adoptive families are as great as we've been LED to believe!
Many adoptive families are quite dysfunctional!
Don't be led!
Lead! ]
[ All previously emotionally-healthy single mothers who lose children to adoption
suffer from
&
struggle with
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder symptoms!
( PTSD )
throughout their lives -
the symptoms worsen with age!
there is no reprieve!
Soon after the loss, mothers suppress & repress to survive!
They employ defense mechanisms, such as,
repression, suppression, and the like.
Resultingly, don't expect them to be fully-functioning.
View them as the amputees that they are!
"to survive"
What does that hackneyed, ubiquitous, phrase mean?
It's bandied about so much that it doesn't even register anymore.
It means that mothers { fathers } who lose kids, lose the "will to live."
People who suffer severe trauma lose the "will to live."
That's why God or Nature or Universe has armed human beings
with "defense mechanisms" -
to get us through the tough times.
But, that's no way to live.
That's no fun.
That's not living Life fully -
because when you suppress bad stuff, good stuff also gets suppressed.
Who wants to live with half of her { his } personality shut down?
If these mothers don't employ suppression & repression...
and other defense mechanisms,
the "will to live" is gone -
out the window.
When the pain is so great, people want to die.
Without the "will to live," suicide looks pretty good.
So, the next time you hear those 2 words bandied about,
you'll know that suicide is, or was, or could have been, not too far away!
Defense mechanisms are natural,
we're all capable of pulling them up when we need them.
They help us escape the pain.
They help us "to survive."
The mind is a powerful Gift! ]
Psychology Class 101:
Defense Mechanisms have 2 primary characteristics:
1. They deny, falsify, or distort reality.
2. They operate UNconsciously, so that the user is not aware of them.
Here are just a few that we've all used alot since childhood:
- Projection
- Displacement
- Rationalization
- Reaction Formation
- Intellectualization
- Repression
- Suppression
- Denial
The following phenomenon is difficult to explicate
but
we'll keep trying.
In other words,
"You had to be there!"
In adulthood, the emotionally-healthy adopted man { adopted woman } searches for answers:
"Who am I?"
"Why was I separated from my first family?"
"Who do I look like?"
"Do I have brothers and sisters?"
"What is my family's medical background?"
"What was my real name before my identity was haughtily altered?"
"Who are my ancestors?"
"What's my real nationality?"
"Of what race am I? I don't look Caucasian."
"Why is my Birth Certificate false? Why does it lie about me?"
"Why am I not respected like every other American citizen is respected?"
"Why does my birth certificate say that my adoptive mother gave birth to me?"
"What does Aunt Sally look like?
"Could my natural family be rich?"
"Why has the U.S. Constitution not protected me and my rights - like it says it does?"
"I'm an adult! Why am I still referred to by my society as 'an adopted child.'"
"Why am I not as valuable as every other citizen in my free society?"
"Where is the respect?"
"Why does my society expect me to be grateful for living?"
"Why is my real birth certificate hidden from me by 'the State'?"
"Why do I have to worry about all of the above instead of concentrating on living?"
"Why is this noose around my neck?"
Along with the search for answers to these perfectly natural questions is a twist - a perversion, of sorts. There is a particularly goofy, feel-good, distorted, judgmental, answer adopted people yearn for! Adoptees love to see, "Where was I better off? I want to compare which family was better for me? My adoptive family? Or, my natural family? I want to see for myself which family was best for me?"
Typically and conveniently, sophomorically, the adopted person allows HIMSELF {HERSELF } 2 very different scenarios or outcomes or possibilities:
{ 1 } Life with the adoptive family
{ 2 } Life with the natural mom { the original family }
BUT, ODDLY...
The adoptee doesn't allow his { her } natural mom the courtesy of the same 2 different scenarios or outcomes or possibilities:
{ 1 } Life with her child
{ 2 } Life without her child
It's inhumane and unfair! Selfish. Uneducated. Uninformed. It's quite haughtily judgmental, and ludicrous, to believe that the natural mom's Life would have been the same { 1 } with her child { 2 } without her child. The adult adoptee loves to believe that his { her } natural mom's Life would have been the same had his { her } natural mom raised him { her } or not raised him {her }. It feels good, "Yippee! Her Life was lousy. I WAS better off adopted. Whew!" The adoptee's Life would be different within the 2 different scenarios; but, his { her } natural mom's Life would NOT be different under the 2 different scenarios.
A mom who has suffered the worst trauma - amputation - that could befall a parent - the loss of a child - A CHILD - is expected to have functioned the same { 1 } with her child { 2 } cut off from her child! That's quite absurdly obnoxious, perverted, wishful thinking!
Just one example:
* Why is this not obvious? ===> The natural mom would have been taken to different environments WITH her child, such as school environments, religious institutions,... whereas cut off from her child via adoption, mom has no need to venture to school environments, and the like, school picnics, hobnobbing with other moms, kids' birthday parties, playgrounds, libraries.... Having been betrayed by religious institutions that promote adoption, the natural mother certainly should not venture back to these religious institutions that have victimized her. Religious institutions have victimized, oppressed, the single mom simply because of her marital status.
Ok - let's try another example if that doesn't fly:
* The crude and criminal manner in which her child was finagled from the single mom leaves her distracted and vulnerable - easy prey for ADDITIONAL predation, oppression, victimization. Victimization breeds victimization - trauma on top of trauma on top of trauma....
To put it even more simply:
Let's cut off your limbs { arms & legs } and see how well you flourish!? Ok?
Posted by Caleigh Brooks at 6/4/2011 11:47 AM 
Categories: Quick Observations
Tags: adoption predation victimization medicine
Categories: Quick Observations
Tags: adoption predation victimization medicine
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